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Fellers, it is time for us men to come clean. In Second Life, it is all about the bewbies!
Oh sure, some of us prefer the rear...but in general, the bewbies are Queen! Forget saying "Baby I love you for your awesome personality," cause the gals ALREADY know the truth, it is the Bewbies that attract us, initially. Why else do newbie men everywhere in SL naturally utter the most basic bad pick-up line of all time.. "Nice tits, wanna fuck?"
picture by Katiya Rhode-Singh, used under a Creative Commons License.
Sure she does, but NOT YOU, moron. She wants someone with a bit more finesse. She wants the
guy who says, "Baby you have the most beautiful... smile... eyes... flowing hair... outfit... legs... shoes... personality, etc" without ONCE mentioning her bewbies, even though she KNOWS that is the real reason he was attracted to her in the first place!
Why else would virtually every woman in sl have graphically enhanced pixel bewbs... along with sexy slut-outfits for every-day wear that accentuate said bewbies to their maximum effect?
picture by Marcophoto Upshaw
Speaking of which, in gods name, can you imagine someone in RL wearing those halter tops that amount to an upside-down bra? Instead of a wire underwire to hold said bewbie-rack high and proud with the top cleavage exposed, THESE gravity-defying tops put the wire on top and NOTHING below.
Bottom cleavage if you will. Can you just imagine wearing THAT top to work, or to the grocery store? Besides the fact that every male within 200 miles would follow you around panting at your heels, the fact remains that those all-day suckers would pop out the bottom every time you made a quick turn on the grocery aisle, or stopped suddenly at work to deliver the boss's coffee.
Can you just imagine the attention you would get when THOSE ballistic missiles popped through the cloud cover?
So, in the spirit of honesty...here is a true story of a flirtation of mine with a nice pair of .... BEWBIES!
/ME TALKS TO A REAL PAIR OF BOOBS....AND A SEXY GURL TOO...
Marcophoto.....I'd love to take your bewbies out dancing some night.
Sexy Gurl.....LOL...they can't dance lol, but they are expert bouncers
Marcophoto.....will you be joining us?
Sexy Gurl.....where?
Marcophoto.....smiles.
Sexy Gurl.....ohhhhhhhhh duh...omg..."formally does NOT give you permission to publish that!" lmao...LOL
Marcophoto.....where? who knows?....just some quiet intimate place for me and your bewbies to snuggle.
Sexy Gurl.....they like very expensive champagne
Marcophoto.....hahaha, ok, deal.
Sexy Gurl.....and are very loud drunks...and just between you and me, I think the left one is jealous of the right one
Marcophoto.....really? should I pour the champagne directly on them? or kiss a mouthful directly to their nipples?
Sexy Gurl.....they will take it any way they can get it
BEWBIE "RANGE WARS"???
Marcophoto.....I always heard the left one is slightly larger.
Sexy Gurl.....shhhh, dont' let rightie hear you
Marcophoto.....ooooo, O.O
Sexy Gurl.....they will be arguing all night...vying for attention
Marcophoto.....well then, thanks for the heads up. I will be sure to give rightie some extra loving attention...stroking and kissing... "There, there Rightie, I have TWO hands so I can love BOTH of you....*gets a mouthful of champagne* who is first?
uh oh, they're arguing now...."Calm down you two, I have plenty for both of you."
Sexy Gurl.....here we go, it's gonna be a rumble
Marcophoto.....Marco lays in the middle, a warm hand cupped over each bewbie.
Sexy Gurl.....like earmuffs
MARCO KEEPS EVERY-BEWBIE HAPPY...
Marcophoto.....the things I do to keep everyone happy....are your inner thighs jealous of my attentions too? he he.
Sexy Gurl.....wonders about my thighs...they are so quiet
Marcophoto.....just wondering, cause my ears are sooo cold, and looking for warm dates....maybe they could double date with your inner thighs?
Sexy Gurl.....but if your ears go there you know where the nose ends up
Marcophoto.....yes, in heaven!
Sexy Gurl.....LOL
"BABY YOU HAVE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL...PERSONALITY!!"
Marcophoto.....just so you know, this is the WEIRDEST conversation I have ever had.
Sexy Gurl.....ooooo.../me is a smarty pants
Marcophoto.....you?
Sexy Gurl.....some say lippy even
Marcophoto.....I love smarty pants....and especially getting into them....but then, you don't wear pants, smart or otherwise.
Sexy Gurl.....has panties...is maybe a smarty pant-IES
Marcophoto.....awww. ok. hmmm, wonders about getting into those smarty panties....but, would not say it out loud....so crudely....
"THE NAMES OF ALL BEWBIES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT...."
Marcophoto.....I can't publish this, huh? a shame.
Sexy Gurl.....LOL...you can change the names to protect the innocent lmao
Marcophoto.....haha, that is actually my motto for regular blogs... "all names changed to protect the guilty."
Sexy Gurl.....LOL
Marcophoto.....will do...I will tuck this away for future use....meanwhile...I would love to stare at your bewbies some more. :) are they presently engaged?
Sexy Gurl.....LOL
--Marco
"MARCO'S TASTY TIDBITS for Tuesday 8/18/09 i.e., funny, strange, weird, cautionary or nice little tidbits and comments from readers about...BEWBIES!!! ...with Ivy, GirlyGirl, SexyGurl, Shelby, Wesley, Melody, Jena, Bru, Talkin, and more..."Is YOUR name mentioned?"
Is YOUR name mentioned?" (P.S. These tidbits are taken from various times in my SL life, and should not be misconstrued to mean that I am cheating on anybody! :-)
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OVERHEARD AT THE 7TH ELEMENT IN GOL...
djcrazy Moragh.....Can I put my face.. Between your boobies... and go.. "Bibbly Bobbily, Boobily Bibbily Boo?"
Kaitlyn Dillinger eyes and smirks
[Editor Marcophoto wonders if that pickup line is working well for djcrazy?]
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OVERHEARD AT SALACIOUS...http://slurl.com/secondlife/Poppen/106/152/30
Shelby.....should really wear a bra while doing this dance
Melody.....I'm not
Wesley.....no you shouldn't
Talkin..... that's gonna tear some tissue, hehe
Shelby.....laughs
Melody..... tugs her top back up
Wesley.....just be free like a bird
Melody.....is glad she is small for once
Jena.....wow Marco.. nice suit!
Bru.....Most clothes I've ever seen Marco wearing
Marcophoto.....LOL
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Marcophoto.....I have a little gift for you.
Ivy ..........you do? 0.0 a pretty dress?
Marcophoto.....better, a beautiful corsage for your future wedding dress.
Ivy ..........oooh...pretty :)
Marcophoto.....I could not resist getting it for you...it was so beautiful. I am sending it to you now.
Ivy ..........awwwww Thank you!!!!
Marcophoto.....try it on. smiles. do you like it?
Ivy ..........0.0 what is it?
Marcophoto.....wear it, then take a close look.
Ivy ..........SAGGY BOOBS???
Marcophoto.....won't they look good attached to your dress?
Ivy ..........hahahhaha
Marcophoto.....can I play with them?
Ivy ..........OMG hahaha
Marcophoto.....though I suspect yours look a lot better.
Ivy ..........nah...pretty close :)
Marcophoto.....lol....thank you for laughing at my silly bewbie joke. smiles.
Ivy ..........hahaha, Everyone laughed at the beach
Marcophoto.....oh my god! You tried it on at the beach?
Ivy ..........hahahah
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Marcophoto.....mmmmm, very nice....heart stopping kiss.
Sexy Gurl.....feels a hand on her chest
Marcophoto.....yes, I noticed that too...I believe it is Thing.
Sexy Gurl.....Thing is making my nipples hard
Marcophoto.....I noticed that...."Ok, Thing. I will take over now...thanks for warming her up"
Sexy Gurl.....appreciates the attention...pushes forward against your hand
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Marcophoto.....hello ...what is new with you?
GirlyGirl.....hey, im afraid of becoming an SL hedonistic freak
Marcophoto.....oh really.....going for the carnal delights are you? They are in aisle 3 at the back of the store.
OHH, correction, those are the CARMEL Delights.
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CUT RATE WEDDING...GETCHER QUICKIE ELOPEMENT AT A LOW-LOW PRICE!!!!
Lol, my tone is in jest, but the wedding service is not... From Monday, August 17th through Friday, August 21st my lovely friend and very experienced wedding officiant...Tovah Bravin is offering a sleek, quickie elopement package for JUST L$500 at her wedding venue, LET'S KNOT AND SAY I DO WEDDINGS. Do you and your honey want a lovely yet simple, fast wedding? She can put YOUR wedding together with as little as one hour advance notice! She also offers full-service weddings.
Contact her inworld for all the details at
http://slurl.com/secondlife/April%20Island/206/206/502
WAS YOUR NAME MENTIONED ABOVE? Maybe it will be, tomorrow... Check back! Do you have a TASTY TIDBIT for Marco? Would you like a free plug for your new business? Have you been to a funny, interesting, strange or just plain weird sim? Tell us all about it! Send a note to me...with your link and pictures...either to marco_photo@yahoo.com, OR drop a notecard on my profile in Second Life... Marcophoto. THANKS!
by Marcophoto Upshaw
AKA: Mark E. Lodge, USA
Copyrighted today, all rights reserved, except for Guest Commentators, who retain their own copyrights, and whose materials are used by permission.
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Please leave a comment about anything in today's issue of Marco's SL Humor Blog:
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Sayyyy, if you liked this posting today, would you tell a friend or two? Just copy/paste the paragraph below to a friend. Thank you so much!...
Wow, you gotta read the crazy, funny stuff this guy writes!
Read all about it today in Marco's SL Humor Blog at: http://www.marcosslhumorblog.blogspot.com/
P.S. There are two surveys at the bottom of the page. Would you take a moment and fill them out? Just scroll aaaaaaaaaalllllll the waaaaaaaaaaaaaay down to the very bottom of this page. Thanks!
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